Ehlabathini lanamhlanje, akunakwenzeka ukumangalisa nabani na ukuxhomekeka okungahambisani naloo nto, kodwa ke abakubonakali ukuba bangabalingani babo okanye abantu besifazane, ngenxa yokuba yonke into efanayo uluntu aluhlali luqonda kwaye luyakhathazeka ngoku. Ngenxa yolu hlobo lobumfihlo, oluqhelekileyo lwenzeka kancinci ngokufihlakeleyo koluntu, njengoko luvela kwedwa, kukho iingxaki. Ngoku kukodwa oku kusebenza kumantombazana angakwazi ukuthandana nomfana ngaphandle kokwazi ukuba ungumfana, kwaye umfana ngeli xesha uya kusebenzisa le ntombazana njengesiqhekeza sakhe, ukwenzela ukuba abonise ubungqina bendoda. Ukuze ungangeni kwiimeko ezinjalo, oko kuya kubakhokelela ekubhujisweni ngokupheleleyo kobudlelwane kunye neinyembezi, kubalulekile ukufundisisa ubuncinane iimpawu ezisisiseko zabalingqingili obuya kunceda njani ukuqonda indoda engumfana. Emva kwakho konke, ngokuqhelekileyo kukho iimeko apho unokungabaza khona ukutyala kobutsha bakho (okanye ungaqhelekanga), ukuze olo lwazi lube lukhulu nakwiyiphi intombazana.
Indlela yokufunda i-gay?
Okokuqala, kuyimfuneko ukuphendukela kumbuzo wencazelo yendoda engumfana ongowesilisa ongowesigxina i-gay, kwaye engekho ummeli ofihlakeleyo okanye ofihlakeleyo kule ncinane yezesondo. Ekubeni kunye nabasetyhini abaye bazimisela ngokuqinisekileyo ngokuzibandakanya zabo ngokwesini, iingxaki ezingabalulekanga kwaye kulula ukuzifunda.
Ukuba sithetha malunga nendlela yokufunda igulane kwisitalato, ngokuyinqobo iingubo. Ewe, iifashthi zanamhlanje zinokukwenza ukuba le nkcazelo ibe nzima, kodwa isitayela sambatho sithetha ngokuthe ngendoda, nangona ukuba akusoloko kulula ukuyichaza. Ngoko ke, abantu abasetyhini badla ngokulandelelana ngokunyanisekileyo baze bahlawule ingqalelo ekubonakala. Ngoko iimpahla zabo zihlala zicocekile, kwaye nayiphi na ingxaki emfanekisweni. Ukongeza, ii-gays zivame ukuba nekhanda eliphezulu kunye nekhwele, isikhumba esifanelekileyo, imilomo, izandla kunye njalo. Ngokuqhelekileyo, abazange bahlawule ingqalelo kwindlela yokubonakala kunabesifazane abasetyhini.
Kuyafaneleka ukuthobela ingqalelo indlela umntu aziphatha ngayo kunye nabameli bezesini. Iingqungquthela zivame ukuba zincinci, zidlala ngothando kwaye ziqhubeke njalo. Ngokuqhelekileyo, iliso lesibonelelo sesifazane liya kuphawulwa ngendlela efanelekileyo yokunxibelelanisa ezinye iimpawu ezingenakukunyanzelwa.
Kwakhona, kwintsimi yokusola, i-bachelors ingawa, nangona ingaba kuphela ekufuneni umfazi ofanelekileyo. Kwaye amadoda amaninzi akhuthaza amalungelo omama okanye, ngokuchaseneyo, akathethi kakuhle ngabameleli besifazane.
Kodwa, enyanisweni, kukulungele ukubuza into yokusola ngokuthe ngqo. Ngokuqhelekileyo, ukuba umntu akayena umfana, uya kuphendula umbuzo. Makube kungekhona impendulo ngokuthe ngqo, kodwa kuya kuqondakala ngokucacileyo kwaye kungabonakali.
Indlela yokuqhawula igayini efihliweyo?
Kodwa ukuba uyachukumisa kumbuzo wendlela yokujonga umlingani ogciniweyo, yonke into iyinkimbinkimbi encinane. Kukho abantu abangenako ukuwamkela ubunzulu babo okanye abanakuziqonda ngokupheleleyo ukuze bathathe isigqibo.
Kodwa ingxaki kukuba yonke imiqondiso onokuyijonga ngayo i-gay ayinakukwazi. Ukuba loo mntu akayithandabuzi uhlobo lwakhe kwaye uyazivuma njengokuba kunjalo, ngoko kulula ukuyibona, nayiphi na intombazana iya kuziva ukuba, njengoko bethetha, into ayilungile. Ngama-gay efihliweyo, kunzima kakhulu, ngoko unakekele yonke into kumntu: ukuthanda kwakhe, ukhetho, isitayela sakhe. Ekugqibeleni, ingaba ubona ubuhle befom yesitalato. Kodwa kunjalo, kunzima ukwenza isigqibo esingabonakaliyo ngokuzimeleyo kwaye sinqweneleka ukuba nencoko ngentliziyo-ntliziyo, ukuze ungabandezeleka ekugqibeleni ngenxa yomntu ongafanelekanga iinyembezi.