Kungekudala, ngokuqhelekileyo unokuva ngeendlela ezithile zobugqi ezikuvumela ukuba utshintshe ubomi bakho bube ngcono. Ezi ziquka i-NLP-neurolinguistic program, ebizwa ngokuba yindlela yokukhangela kwengqondo. Ikuvumela ukuba ukhohlise umnxibelelwano kwicala lakho ngaphandle kokugweba ixesha elide kwaye uzisa ubungqina obuninzi. Ubuhle be-NLP kukuba akukho mpembelelo "ebunzini." Umntu unyaniseka ngokuqinisekileyo ukuba zonke iintetho ezithethwa ngumnxibelelwano zibonakalisa iingcamango zakhe, kodwa ngubani ongavumelani naye? Kwiingxoxo zengcali, ezo zakhono ziyimfuneko ngokuqinisekileyo, kodwa i-NLP ingaba luncedo kumantombazana afuna ukuthandwa ngabantu besini?
Iindlela ze-NLP zabasetyhini ngomhla
Okokuqala, kubalulekile ukuba sikhankanye ukuba ngoku asiyathethi malunga nokunciphisa indoda - sonke sisebenzise ukucinga ngokucwangcisa iskimu esithile, kuphela bambalwa abanokucinga okungokoqobo, kodwa ezo zinto zingenasisetyenziswa ukuzenza kubo. Kwakhona, ungasebenzisi i-NLP ukunxibelelana nalabo baqhelene nale ndlela-akukho mntu uthanda ukusetyenziswa. Kwaye kumntu ohlala esebenza kunye ne-NLP, umzekelo, kwi-psychologist okanye kwiingcali ekuthengiseni, imizamo yakho kunye nayo yonke iya kuba yinto ekhohlisayo. Ngoko qaphela.
Ngoko, yintoni enokunceda iindlela ze-NLP kubasetyhini ngomhla?
- Wonke umntu uyazi ukuba amadoda adinga ukudunyiswa. Yenza njalo! Ukuba uyazi malunga naziphi na iimpazamo okanye ziya kufumaneka entlanganisweni, zidumise umntu, uguqule iziphoso zakhe kwiziqhamo. Ngokomzekelo, uya kukhalaza ngeentlungu zakhe, amqinisekise ukuba kuhle kakhulu.
- Khumbula indlela abathandana banxibelelana ngayo - banamazwi afanayo, amazwi, kunye nempawu. Oku kubangelwa ukuba bebude obufanayo, bajonga ihlabathi ngendlela efanayo. Kodwa ngubani owathi awukwazi ukutshatyalaliswa komtshini womnye umntu kwintlanganiso yokuqala? Zama ukuthatha i-pose efanayo, okokuqala, ukuba ingabangeli ukukhanyela, zama ukukopisha amagama kunye nezenzo. Yenza nje into engabonakaliyo, ukwenzela ukuba ungabonakali ukuba uyamngcaza umntu.
- Thetha malunga nabangaphantsi kwamantombazana amaninzi ngomhla uvaliwe, kodwa i-NLP ikhuthaza iingxoxo ezinjalo. Buza le ndoda into awayithandayo ngayo intombi yakhe yangaphambili, makhe akhumbule zonke izinto ezilungileyo ezazisenyongweni lwabo. Emva koko qhubela ukuncoma, uthetha nje nje ngokuba egameni lakhe, umzekelo "mhlawumbi wayeyithanda kakhulu izandla zakho ezinamandla". Isinyathelo esilandelayo indoda idinga ukuphumla, ngenxa yale njongo isiselo esincinci sotywala okanye umdaniso omncinci ulungile. Ngokumalunga nokukhula kwendoda iya kuxela umnqweno wakhe wokuzivumelanisa nawe. Hlola uqikelelo lwakho ngokutshintsha i-intonation okanye i-pose yakho. Ukuba umnxibelelwano uzama ukuyikopisha - iyakho. Khangela ukuphendula komlingane, xa ehlaziya, uye kumbambiswano osondeleyo-thintela isandla, cindezela kuye ngokufutshane. Ukuba oku kungabangeli ukuphazamiseka kwakhe, qhubeka, ukuba umntu uyabuyisela emuva - buyele kwingxoxo.
- Oko ukwenza ngokulandelayo kuxhomekeke kuwe. Ufuna ukusondelana, qhubeke uqhubeka neengxaki zakho. Ufuna indoda ukuba icinge ngawe, iyalala ngaphandle kwengcaciso, yithi nje ukhawuleza. Umphumo uya kuba! Inyaniso kukuba ngolo hlobo olukhanyayo kunye
iinkumbulo ezintle zengaphambili, loo mntu uqala ukudibanisa indlela enomdla ngayo nawe.
Ewe, oku akuzona zonke iindlela ze-NLP ezinokunceda kubasetyhini, zininzi iincwadi ezikule sihloko. Ngokomzekelo, "Ukususela ngoko, baye bahlala bevuya ngonaphakade" (L. Cameron-Baedler) okanye "NLP. Amageyimu apho abesifazane bawina "(u-Anwar Bakirov). Ngoko ke, ukuba ubuchule bokuxhaphaza bukunomdla, ufunde, uzame kwaye uphumelele impumelelo. Enyanisweni, ngokuphindaphindiweyo amadoda asezinyaweni zethu ngenxa ye-NLP yabasetyhini, kodwa ngenxa yobugcisa bokuba ngumfazi - ithenda, kodwa ifuna, inomnandi, kodwa inamacwecwe.