Kwiifom ungasoloko ufumana iingxelo ezinjenge "Ndifuna ukuvuma umntu onothando, kodwa andazi ukuba" okanye "Ndiyayika ukuvuma kumntu othandweni kuqala." Kwaye naphezu kokubonakala kubulula, nangona kubonakala kulula, yintombazana enesibindi kwaye inokuzimela yedwa inako ukuthetha amagama amathathu axabisekileyo "Ndiyakuthanda!" Bonke bafumana isibindi ngaphambi kokuba bavume iimvakalelo zabo. Kodwa ngaba kuyimfuneko ukuvuma loo mfana othandweni kuqala, ngaba akuyi kubangelwa ukungaqondi kakuhle kwinto yakhe kunye nemvakalelo yokuba intombazana ifuna ukunciphisa inkululeko yakhe? Ngesizathu esithile, abaninzi abantu, bavuma uthando intombazana, abaziveki zibophelelo zabo, kodwa cinga ukuba ukuba intombazana ivakalisa iimvakalelo zakhe, isinyathelo sayo esilandelayo, esiya kulandela ngokukhawuleza, iya kuba yintetho ngomtshato? Yaye akubona bonke abakulungele ukuphuhliswa kweziganeko. Ngako oko, umbuzo wokuba uqaphele umlingane wakho uphambili, ukufumana indawo yokumamela ukuphendula, ukukhangeleka okubukhali akunakwenzeka umntu ofuna. Ukuze sigweme isiganeko esinjalo, siyaqonda indlela kunye nexesha lokuthetha kangcono iimvakalelo zabo.
Nini?
Ngoko, ndimele ndijonge ntoni ukuze ndiqikelele ixesha elifanelekileyo? Ngokwemvelo, kwiimeko zakhe, akunakwenzeka ukuba umfana ophethe umsebenzi (ukufunda) okanye ukubukela umdlalo weqela lakhe ozithandayo, uya kuthatha isigqibo ngokufanelekileyo. Yaye kungekhona ngenxa yokuba akanandaba, akayikuva - abantu banesipho esiyingqayizivele ukugxila kwingxaki enye, ngokukhawuleza ukuyeka ukuqonda ihlabathi elibajikelezile. Ngoko ke, silinde de kube intanda ethandekile kwaye iya kuba ilungele ukwamukela ukuvuma kwakho. Ngendlela, udibene na ixesha elide? Vumelani, nishumayele ngokukhawuleza ukuvuselela iimvakalelo ezincineni kwintlanganiso yesibini, kuya kuba yinto engafanelekanga. Nika ithuba umntu okhethiweyo ukuba asebenzise ukubonakala kwakho ebomini bakhe, kwaye ke ngoko uthethane ngothando lwakhe.
Njani?
Ngubani na umlingane wakho, ongathandabuzekiyo onothando okanye ohamba phambili, kunye nexesha eliyiminyaka emihlanu ezayo? Umntu othandana naye uya kuvuyiswa xa ugqiba ukuvuma ukuba uyamthanda kakuhle, ukuba ulungiselele isidlo sokukhanyisa isikhanyiso okanye ipikiniki phezu kophahla, phantsi kwelanga. Ukuba intandokazi nayo iyindawo yokutya, kufuneka kubekho indawo etafileni izitya ezithandayo, nangona ungazithandi. Akunomzuzu ongahlali kwindawo leyo, mhlawumbi, uya kufumana i-romance yinto engadingekile, ngoko kufuneka uvelise into enye, into ephambili ibangelwa kwimoya. Ngokomzekelo, uyavuya ngento ethile, uthetha ngesizathu sesimo sakhe esihle, enokongeza imvakalelo yakhe ngokuvuma kwakhe (musa ukuphazamisa, makakhulume). Iingqungquthela kumncedi wamathambo kunzima ukubamba imizwa, kwaye ukuyeka iibhandlela akukwazi ukuyifumana, yintoni oyenzayo? Mxelele ngeemvakalelo zabo, kungekhona kwi-bay-floundering, kodwa emva kokulungiselela. Mdumise nayiphi na into, umfana uya kuphumla, akhohlwe into elandelayo ekhoyo kwishedyuli yanamhlanje kwaye uya kuba ukulungele ukuphulaphula. Ngendlela, ishishini elibi lingabhala i-sms okanye umyalezo kwi-imeyile.
Ngokwemvelo, akukho mntu uthatha ilungelo lakho lokuvuma uthando lwakho kwinkwenkwe ngendlela yokuqala. Kuphela umbono woqobo uhlukile kuwo wonke umntu, umntu uyamangalisa ibhanki enezibhengezo zothando oluposwe ngamafasitela egumbini lakhe lokulala, kwaye umntu uthinta ikhekhe yaseValentine ngamazwi amnandi. Ngoko sicinga ukuba iqabane lakho lisondele kwaye likhethe indlela efanelekileyo yokuqaphela.
Kakade ke, akukho zindlela zendalo okanye iingcebiso malunga nokuvuma kumntu othandanayo, ngoko
Kwaye ukuba usenayo ingcamango yokuba "Ndifuna ukuvuma kumfana othandweni, kodwa ndoyika", cinga ukuba uqinisekile ukuba lo ngumntu wakho. Ukuba kunjalo, akukho nto yokwesaba, uya kuqonda kwaye ayayixabisa. Yaye ukuba kukho ukungathandabuzeki, ke ukuqwalasela yindlela efanelekileyo yokuyicombulula. Kwaye nangona umthandayo ethatha ngendlela eyahlukileyo kunokuba uyathanda, vuyisa - uyaqonda ukuba awuyi kukwazi ukwakha ubudlelwane nomntu, ngoku, kwaye kungekhona emva kweminyaka edlulileyo.