Ulwaphulo-mthetho aluhlali lulimaza ngokwenyama, kwaye ukulimala komzimba akusoloko kuluhlobo olubi kunabo bonke. Ubundlobongela beengqondo bukhokelela ekukhathazweni kwengqondo, kwaye yena, ukuzithemba. Ngenxa yoko, uluntu lufumana unxibelelwano olungaphantsi, kwaye wena (oko kukuthi, unxibelelwano) unqatshelwe ubomi obusisiseko.
Umphumo wokusetyenziswa kakubi ngokwengqondo kungabangela uxinzelelo , uxinzelelo, ukwesaba, ukuphazamiseka kwengxaki yokuhamba kwengxaki, kwaye mhlawumbi ubundlobongela emzimbeni (ngokuqhelekileyo kudala omnye). Kwimeko nayiphi na into, khumbula: abantu abanobuchopho bezengqondo, phantse i-100% yamatyala ngokwawo ayenokubandezeleka ngabanye. Ezi zinokuthi zingabhekanga izikhalazo zabantwana, ubuncinci beengxaki ezisetyenziselwa ukuziphindezela, ukunyelisa, ukuhleka usulu kunye neentlekele. Kwimbali yecandelo ngalinye lomlawuli (ukuba ukhangeleka kakuhle), unokufumana umzuzu xa umntu oqhelekileyo ehlambalaza kakhulu, ethembise ngokwakhe, ukuba akhule "onamandla kwaye onamandla" ukuze abuyisele kulabo bamthukayo.
Iintlobo zokusetyenziswa kakubi kwengqondo
Ubundlobongela obungokomzwelo buhlala bubonakalisa ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo, ngabanye. Kodwa ukuba siqokelela ndawonye onke amacala kunye nezigqibo, siyafumana uluhlu olulandelayo lweentlobo zobundlobongela ngengqondo:
- ukuthotywa - ukugweba, ukugxeka, ukuhlekisa, ukuhlekisa;
- ukulawula - ukuphatha ixhoba njengomntwana, khumbuza ukuba ukuziphatha okunjalo akuvumelekanga, ukulawula imali, rhoqo ukukhumbuza ukuphosa;
- ukubeka phambili iimfuno - ixhoba lingaphathwa ngegama, kwaye lisebenzisa amagama omnxeba, umdlwenguli uphawula ixhoba ngenxa yokungaphumeleli kunye nokuhluleka kwakhe;
- uyayigxina - usebenzisa ihluthwa njengesigwebo;
- i-codependence - ixhoba liba "intambo".
Uhlobo olubi kakhulu lwezobungqingili zengqondo kunye nolwasemoyeni lubonakala. Eli gama lithetha ukuba entlokweni ixhoba lihlwanyela ukungathandabuzeki malunga nobutyebi bakhe. Xa umdlwenguli ukhubekile, kwaye ukhubekile, uthi uzivale kakhulu. Ukuba umntu uphinda ngokuphindaphinda into enye, unokungabaza ukuba ufanelekile ukujonga kwakhe. Iimpawu eziphambili zokugaya:
- uyazibuza ukuba awunako ukukhathazeka;
- uyika ukwenza ukhetho olulula;
- uhlala uxolo;
- uhlola uluvo lwakho.
Ngokugqithiseleyo, iimpawu zobundlobongela beengqondo zibonakala ngokucacileyo kwizibini ezitshatileyo, ubudlelwane bobudlelane-phantsi, phakathi kwabahlobo (umhlobo "umhlobo"), kunye nakwizinga elikhulu - "amandla kunye nabantu."
Into enzima kakhulu ukujamelana nobudlova ngokwengqondo ekhaya, xa kufike kumntu othandekayo kuwe. Into yokugqibela okufuneka uyenze into yokuxhatshaza , kwaye ukhetho olukhethekileyo kukuba ungagxininise ukuba umntu uphathisa njani ubomi bakho, kodwa njani (wena ngokwakho) ufuna ukuphucula ubudlelwane bakho.