Akunjalo ngaso sonke isikhathi umntu ngumgwenxa wezakhiwo zabo. Njengomthetho, sifumana ezi ngxaki njengomntwana, sibafumana ngokukhuliswa kwethu. Abazali abangenamava, ngokuqinisekileyo, abafuni ukwenza njalo kwaye abaqondi kakuhle, bahlakulele iintlobo ezahlukeneyo kubantwana babo. Amanyathelo ezemfundo esekelwe ukwesatshiswa komntwana, isijeziso, ukuthotywa kwenkohlakalo esikhathini esizayo akuyi kuzisa into emhle kumntu. Ukusebenza kuphela ukulahla izifo zabo zangaphakathi kuya kwanda. Indlela yokukrazula iingxaki zezingane kwaye kutheni kubalulekile ukwenza - impendulo yalo mbuzo ibalulekile kulowo nalowo wethu.
Susa konke okungeyomfuneko
Ziziphi iingxaki zomntu? Okokuqala, esi sikhokelo, izithintelo esizibekayo kuzo. Ngokuqhelekileyo ezi zinto zicinge, iimpawu ezibonakalayo kunye nempawu zobonakala kunye nomlinganiso owenza umlinganiselo wokuziphatha komntu kwaye uxabise ukuzithemba kwakhe. Inkululeko iyisipho esihle, apho iindawo zethu eziyinkimbinkimbi zihamba ngayo yonke indlela. Ufuna ukuba ngumntu okhululekileyo - ukulahla izakhiwo ezinzima. Njani ukwenza oku? - Masifunde kwaye sihambe ngokugqithiseleyo kubo.
Indlela yokukrazula ubunzima obungaphantsi?Ukuvakalelwa kobuphantsi, ukuphakama ngaphezu kwabanye abantu-ukungahlambuluki kakubi kuchaphazela kakubi isimo sengqondo, sengqondo kunye nokuziphatha komntu. Ukuze uyilahle, kufuneka uqonde isizathu sayo. Kungabangelwa ukucwaswa kwabanye, ukukhathazeka kwengqondo, iimpazamo kunye nokuhluleka. Ukuba le mbuzo kunzima ukuyiqonda ngokuzimeleyo, kuyimfuneko ukutyelela uncedo lugqirha kwaye u tyelele iiseshoni eziliqela ze-psychotherapy.
Ukuba ucaphukiswa ngumsebenzi wabantu abakukho, zikhusele ekuxoxaneni nabo, zibe ngaphezu kwazo. Zithokoze ngaphandle, bhala kwiphepha lephepha ocinga ukuba liyimfanelo yakho, dwelisa ukuphumelela kwakho nezenzo ezilungileyo. Kwikholam elandelayo, cwangcisa ukusilela kwakho, ubuthathaka - into ongathanda ukuyichitha. Emva koko qalisa ukusebenza. Njalo qalisa ngokuhlalutya ingxaki kunye nemeko apho ukhona. Emva koko uza kubona iinjongo kunye nemisebenzi eyimfuneko yokulungisa ingxaki.
Uyakususa njani ixhoba elinzima?
Okokuqala, sigqibo, mhlawumbi uthanda ukuzakhela ixhoba, rhoqo kwiimeko zokubandezeleka kwaye uvelane nabanye. Ukuba impendulo ayibi, ngoko unako ukulahla lula inkxwaleko yexhoba. Ukuba kukho naluphi na usizi kwixesha lakho elidlulileyo, kodwa wakwazi ukulufumana, welula amaphiko akho, ekugqibeleni, uqonde ukuba yonke into isemva, uhlala kwaye ujabule kuyo yonke imihla. Oko kungasibulali kusenza sibe namandla, khumbula oku.
Uyakususa njani ulwaphulo-mthetho?
Inkxalabo yecala ixhomekeka ngokuqinisekileyo kunye nokwakheka komntu onoxanduva kwabanye. Enyanisweni, akukho nto ngaphandle kokuxhatshazwa kwengqondo. Umntu wenza iphosakelo, ngoxa wayengawuthobeli iinqophiso zesazela sakhe, kwaye ngenxa yoko, ngoku uhlushwa ngumntu onetyala, elinegunya ngamanye amaxesha aphindaphindiwe ngamaxesha amaninzi. Ukukrazula isicatshulwa sentyala kuya kunceda ukuguquka kwakho kunye nenkcazo kumntu oye wabangela ingozi. Akukaze kube mva ukucela ukuxolelwa, into eyona nto kukuba kufuneka ibe yinyani.
Indlela yokukrazula ubunzima obupheleleyo?
Ukuba unzima ngokwenza ubunzima bakho, unokhetho oluninzi lokusombulula le ngxaki: okokuqala, unokuthi ulahlekelwe isisindo. Unelungelo lokwenzela uxolo, uthathe isigqibo sokutshintsha wena nobomi bakho. Umthetho, kuba akukho mntu uza kukukwenza. Yenza ngokwakho ukudlula kwesibuko, ufuna umzuzwana uhlale kwaye uzibonge. Nokuba uzamkele ngendlela oyiyo - oku kuyindlela yesibini. Fumana ngokwakho oko unokuziqhayisa, ugxininise isidima sakho, kwaye uzama ukufihla iziphoso zalo mfanekiso ngoncedo lweempahla ezikhethiweyo.
I-Psychology kumbuzo wokuba ulahlekelwe njani iinkomfa, unomnye. Xa kubonakala kuwe ukuba bacinga kakubi ngawe, uhlambalaza, ungaphantsi, ugxeka-oku kuthetha into ehluke ngokupheleleyo. Kule meko, uhlambalaza kwaye uzigxeka.
Ngoku uya kukhubeka ngumntu?