Inkqubo ye "kroti kunye nokunamathela" sele isetyenzisiwe ekukhulisweni kwabantwana, xa abazali bexhatshaza nokudumisa ngenxa yezenzo zabo. Kodwa akusoloko abantu abadala beqonda ukuba kusemfuneko ukuba bakwazi ukudumisa ngokufanelekileyo, ngaphandle koko kungenziwa kube nzima. Ngako oko, kwinqaku esiza kuyicinga ukuba kutheni kunye nendlela yokudumisa isizukulwana esincinane, njengenye yeendlela zokukhuthaza.
Iindlela zokukhuthaza
Izindlela ezahlukeneyo zokukhuthaza kufuneka zisetyenziswe kuxhomekeke kwimeko ethile evelayo, kuba ukuba usebenzisa indlela efanayo, uya kuphelisa ukusebenza.
- Uvavanyo oluhle lwezenzo okanye ukubonakala komntwana - lubonakaliswa ngamagama: "Ndiyathanda", "Yimangalisa!", "Ndiyavuya kuwe", "Kuhle kakhulu!". Le ndlela ilungele ukusebenzisa xa uqala ishishini elitsha ngokupheleleyo;
- kuvunywa - "Ngoko qhubeka," "Usebenza ngokugqibeleleyo," "Wenza okuhle," "Ulungile!". Ukusetyenziswa ukuxhasa umntwana ekuqaleni kwezenzo zakhe, nokucacisa ukuba wenza konke okulungileyo. Kwaye ukuba ufuna ukunika iingcebiso malunga nendlela engcono yokuyenza, emva koko emva kokuvunywa kwamagama, uya kuqonda ngakumbi;
- indumiso - "Wenze kakuhle!", "Umnichka!", "Nonke niphumelele!". Udumo luye lwavavanywa ngesiphumo sokugqibela sezenzo okanye izenzo ezenziwe;
- ukuncoma - okuqhelekileyo kusetyenziswa ubuntu (iimpawu zobuntu, ukubukeka okanye ngeemvakalelo zakho neemvakalelo) kunye nezenzo (ukuqala nokuphela).
Kutheni ufanele udumise abantwana?
Ukudumisa kuyimfuneko nje ukuba umntwana akholelwe kuye, abe nethemba ngakumbi, aphinde aphinde aphelelwe umvakalelo kwaye agcwalise isisityebi sokuqiniseka ukuba uya kuyidinga ebomini bakhe. Kwakhona kuyimfuneko ukwenzela ukuba uqaphele kwiintsana zakhe izakhono ezifihliweyo, ukumqhubela ekuphuhlisweni kwazo. Ivuselela umnqweno wokuphindaphinda oko kwenziwe, ukuphumeza umphumo olungileyo. Kodwa ukusetyenziswa rhoqo kwendumiso ngenxa yesiphumo kubangele ukubunjwa kwabantwana bokungabikho kwamanyathelo, ukungafuni ukugqiba loo nto, ukuba babona ukuba umphumo oyifunayo awusebenzi. Ngoko ke, nangona oko kwenzeka, kufuneka ufumane oko unokumdumisa umntwana.
Emva kwayo yonke into, ngokuqhelekileyo abantwana, abanqabile ukuvakalelwa ngabazali babo okanye abafumene ngokungasifanelanga, baxhamla kwi-egocentrism, bebonakaliswe ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo.
Indlela yokudumisa umntwana ngokuchanekileyo?
Ukuqinisekisa ukuba indumiso yakho ayilimazi ukukhuliswa komntwana wakho, ezi zilandelayo ziphakamiso mazihambelane:
- Indumiso kufuneka ibe yinyani, ingathà sina, ngaphandle kokusetyenziswa kweengxoxo zentsingiselo kunye neengxaki.
- Dumise kuphela xa kuyimfuneko, kungekhona ubuchule bakhe bendalo okanye oko awaziyo ukwenza kakuhle, kodwa kwenzeka ntoni ukuba wenza umgudu.
- Ekudumiseni akukho ndawo yokuthelekisa - kuya kuphazamisa ingqondo yomntwana kwaye kunciphise umnqweno wokwenza into nhlobo.
- Udumo akufanele lube lukhulu kakhulu - mhlawumbi umntwana uyayeka ukuyixabisa, uya kuxhomekeka kuyo, kwaye iya kuphelelwa ukuba ngumvuzo. Kodwa ukuyeka ukudumisa ngokubanzi kunobungozi - unokuhlakulela ubunzima obuphantsi komntwana.
- Ukudumisa isenzo somntwana, oko akufezekisileyo, kungekhona ngumntu wonke - ngoko ke, kubonwe imbono efanelekileyo
ngokwakhe, kunokuziphakamisa ukuzithemba nokuzithemba .
Khumbula ukuba abantu abadala, izenzo ezifana nokuguqula izinto ngokufanelekileyo okanye ukuthatha udoti zibhekwa njengento elula, kwaye umntwana omncinci uphumelele kakhulu, ngoko ke, nangenxa yezenzo ezinjalo, ufanelwe udumo, kodwa ngokumodareyitha.
Ukusebenzisa indumiso, ngokuqwalasela iziphakamiso ezichazwe ngasentla, njengendlela yokukhuthaza, uya kuba nako ukufundisa abantwana bakho ngokuzithemba, abantu abaphumelelayo. Yaye ungakulibali ukuba kulungile ukuhlwaya umntwana .