Ukuba ngumzali luvavanyo olukhulu. Amanqabana omntwana, ukungathobeli kwakhe, izikhalazo zootitshala nabanye ... - "Khawundixelele ukuba kutheni bengabakhonkongo ngommelwane waseVaska, kodwa kuConstantine wam ..."
Zingaphi imizuzu engathandekiyo kuyimfuneko ukuba uhambe, xa kuyimfuneko ukuphendulwa kungekuphela kwabo, kodwa nakwezenzo zabanye abantu. Indlela kuphela yokuphuma ukufundisa. Kodwa njani? Kwizithethe zaseAngilane, apho ijeziso somfundi ongathobeliyo, ootitshala basebenzisa iindlela ezikhethekileyo zee-rattan, apho bawabetha khona izandla kunye neentsimbi zetyala? Ukusebenzisa indlela "yendabuko" yokujezisa umntwana onobhantshi? Okanye ngokusebenzisa ingcinezelo yengqondo?
Kutheni ungajezisi abantwana abanebhanti?
Ngokuqinisekileyo bonke abantwana beengqondo zeengqondo baphendula umbuzo othi "ngaba unako ukubetha abantwana abaneengcongolo?" Akubi. Ukugxeka abantwana abangathobeliyo kuphela akusiziphumo ezifunayo (ngamanye amagama, ayifundanga nantoni), kodwa nayo inefuthe elibi kakhulu ekubunzeni umlingani womntwana kunye nokuziva kwakhe ukuzithemba. Ngaphezu koko, kungakhathaliseki ukuba umzali uyazisebenzisa njani isixhobo sokujezisa esandleni sakhe, nayiphi na isohlwayo "ezintliziyweni" bubungqina bokuba ingamandla, kodwa, ngokuchasene noko, ubuthathaka bakhe. Imvakalelo enempilo yomntwana iya kuhlala ixelela ngaye.
Ukuba akunjalo ibhande, ngoko njani?
Imfundo iphumelela kungekhona kwimeko apho umzali othukutheleyo egalela "ibhokhwe yesikhumba" entloko yomntwana wakhe okanye, ngaphandle kokunqanda ulwalamano lwakhe, "uyayinyamekela ingqumbo", kodwa kuphela xa elambileyo ilizwi, apho kungekho mthunzi wentukuthelo, uchaza indlela yokwenza kakuhle, kodwa indlela yokwenza ngayo ayikufanelekanga.
Njengoko "ingxabano ephumelelayo", akufanele 'ucinezele inceba' kwaye utshilo ukuba unentloni ngezenzo zakhe (oku akunakunceda umntwana ukuba akwazi ukujamelana nale meko, kodwa kunokunyusa iingxaki zakhe kwaye zonakalisa ukuthembeka kwakho). Eyona ndlela iphumelele kakhulu ingaba yindoda ebandayo "ukuba ..., ke ...". "Ukuba awuyi kuhlambulula igumbi lakho kanye ngeveki, andinakukunika imali yokuthenga umdlalo omtsha, owandixelele ngezolo," - ngoko, ngokuzitheleyo kwaye ngokuzithemba, unokuthi uyihlo kwonyana wakhe kwaye okokuqala ngqa "ukuyibuyisela le nto ekupheleni" - ukugcina ilizwi lakhe. Khumbula nje ukuba okokuqala imimiselo enjalo ayifanele ibe ngaphezulu kweyodwa kwiintsuku ezintathu, kwaye ukuphumeza okuqinisekileyo kuyimfuneko nge-100%.
Eyona ndlela iphumelele ngakumbi kunesihlwayo somntu kunye nokunyanzeliswa kwengqondo, kukho incoko nomntwana njengomdala. Zama!