Ukukhulelwa ngenye yexesha elihle kakhulu ebomini bobomi. Kodwa okokuqala, kufuneka uqonde ukuba ukukhulelwa yinkqubo yemvelo yendalo, ehamba kunye neenguqu ezihlukahlukeneyo kumzimba wesifazane. Ngokumalunga nale ntshintsho, ibhinqa linokuvakalelwa ngokwahlukileyo kwizigaba ezahlukeneyo zokukhulelwa. Ngokuqhelekileyo, bobabini abatshatileyo bafumana uvuyo lweendaba ezifana nokuzalwa komntwana, kodwa oku kwenzekayo xa indoda nomfazi bethemba omnye komnye, kwaye phakathi kwabo kukho uthando nokuqonda. Yaye ukuba umfazi engenalo ithemba kumntu wakhe, ke kukho ingxaki encinci.
Indlela yokuxelela umyeni wam malunga nokukhulelwa?
Ingxaki eqhelekileyo phakathi kwabasetyhini abaye bafunda ngokukhulelwa kwabo yindlela yokuxelela ngokufanelekileyo amadoda abo malunga nesimo sabo esithakazelisayo kunye nendlela yokulungiselela umyeni ngokukhulelwa. Abasetyhini abaninzi banenkxalabo malunga nale ngxaki, kuba indoda ingasilungelelwanga ngokupheleleyo le meko ngezizathu ezahlukahlukeneyo. Kwaye kumfazi, inkxaso yendoda ethandekayo idlala indima ebalulekileyo kule mzuzwana. Ngoko njani? Indlela yokuxelela umntu ngokukhulelwa? Kukho iindlela ezininzi zokuxelela umyeni wakho malunga nokukhulelwa, ungabonisa ezi ndaba ngeendlela ezimangalisayo, ungaqalisa ingxoxo ebalulekileyo, njalo njalo. Yenza njengoko intliziyo ixelela.
Ukuphendula komntu ekukhulelweni kunokubonakalisa ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo. Musa ukulibazisa iindaba ozikhulelweyo ngenxa yokoyika. Khumbula, ukuba umyeni ufumanisa ngokukhulelwa kwakho kungekuwe (umzekelo, ukusuka kwelinye ilungu losapho), oku kuya kuba yithuba lesincoko okanye ingxaki. Indoda inokuziva ikhohlisiwe kwaye ibuze umthendeleko kwintsapho. Kufuneka ufike ngendlela yokuxelela umyeni wakho ngokukhulelwa. Kucetyiswa ukuba wenze lokhu kwindawo ephumlekileyo, enomdla ekhaya, ukuze umyeni ovela emsebenzini aphelelwe yimpembelelo emzimbeni wendlu yakho elwa nxamnye neendaba ezintle.
Ukuphendula komntu ekukhulelweni
Amadoda amaninzi ayavuya ngeendaba ezilungileyo, kuba yintoni enokuba yindoda enhle kunokuba nguyise! Kodwa akubona bonke abantu abakulungele oku. Oku kuloyikisa loo ntokazi. Ukuba ukukhulelwa akucwangciswanga, ngoko umntu akayikumangaliswa ngeli gidimi elonwabileyo, kodwa akanelisekanga nalo. Kukho imeko xa ufunda ngokukhulelwa, umyeni uphosa umfazi wakhe. Kwaye akukho mntu uphephe.
Abasetyhini abaninzi bayesaba ukuba ngexesha lokukhulelwa umyeni uya kuqala ukutshintsha, njengoko ukubonakala kwesisu okanye inzuzo yesisindo kuya kuthintela ubuhlobo obusondeleyo. Le ngcamango yengqondo yomfazi okhulelweyo, abaninzi banokuziva ngeemeko ezingathandekiyo ebomini babahlobo okanye abahlobo ukuba ukukhulelwa kunokubangela ukunyeliswa komyeni wakhe ngenxa yokunciphisa kwezesondo ngexesha lokukhulelwa. Kukho imeko xa ukukhulelwa kubangela iingxaki kumyeni onxulumene nokungabikho kokuqonda omnye komnye, kodwa kuxhomekeke kwinqanaba lobudlelwane phakathi kwendoda nomfazi.
Lungiselela umyeni wakho ngokukhulelwa
Amadoda ngexesha lokukhulelwa anokuziphatha ngendlela eyahlukileyo. Lungisa umyeni wakho ngokukhulelwa, kufuneka uqaphele, ukwenzela ukuba ukutshabalalisa ngokugqithisileyo kungonakalise intshiseko yakhe. Enyanisweni, indoda enothando ngexesha lokukhulelwa ifuna ukuzondela intando yakhe nentando yakhe kumzuzwana omhle wobomi babo kunye. Kodwa ngamanye amaxesha amadoda angenangqondo kwaye anomsindo kuba kubonakala ngathi bakhulelwe. Umyeni onothando ngethuba lokukhulelwa komfazi unokuziva enomthwalo ophezulu kwimpilo yintanda yakhe, kwaye ngoko ke uthatha imisebenzi eyahlukeneyo yasekhaya, uqala ukukhokela indlu kwaye afundise izalamane ukuba ziphathe njani ngeli xesha lentsapho yobomi. Ukungenelela akuyimfuneko, ukuba umntu, akayikugoba intonga (umzekelo, ukunyanzelisa izihlobo ekungeneni kwindlu ukuba zigqoke amabhinti e-gauze ebusweni!). Okubi nakakhulu, ukuba indoda ingayikhokheli ngokwaneleyo umfazi wayo, ikholelwa ukuba ukukhulelwa kuyinto eqhelekileyo, kwaye umfazi uyakwazi ukujamelana nale nto ngokwayo. Ibhinqa kule ndawo "inomdla" ifuna nje uncedo kunye nenkxaso, kungekhona kuphela emzimbeni, kodwa nangokwengqondo. Nawuphi na umfazi okhulelweyo ufuna ukuba naye indoda yakhe igcwale uthando ngomntwana ongakazalwa kwaye angabelana naye, zonke iimvakalelo ezintsha ezivela kuye kweli nqanaba lobomi. Kodwa, nangona kunjalo, isimo sengqondo sokukhulelwa phakathi kwamadoda nabasetyhini ahluke. Emva koko, le ntokazi, ngaphezu kwayo yonke, umgcini wekhaya, ingumninkosikazi, kwaye indoda yindoda yokutya, kufuneka ikwazi ukondla intsapho yakhe. Yaye loo ndoda ngexesha lokukhulelwa komfazi wayo, kufuneka kuqala okokunyamekela impumelelo yentsapho, kunokuba ithathe isigxina semisebenzi yasemakhaya ibe ngumfazi wendlu. Bobabini amaqela kufuneka afumane ukuqonda ngokufanayo kwaye achaze uxanduva lwabo. Emva koko, umfazi okhulelweyo unokucinga ukuba umyeni wakhe uhlawula ixesha elincinane, kwaye umyeni wakhe usebenza nje ngokugqoka kunye nokukrazula ngenxa yenkxaso yenkxaso yentsapho nayo yonke into efunekayo.
Ukukhulelwa - kutheni umyeni engafuni ukulala ngesondo?
Kodwa kuthekani ukuba indoda iyaziphatha ngokuhlukileyo ngexesha lokukhulelwa komfazi? Ngaba uzenza ngathi akukho nto eyenzekayo, okanye uziphatha ngokugqithiseleyo? Ukuziphatha komyeni ngexesha lokukhulelwa kungahluka kancinci kwizinto eziqhelekileyo. Kule nto ayikho into engaqhelekanga, kuba umntu uya kuba neengcamango ngaphambi kokungena. Ngokomzekelo, umntu ucinga ngokukhawuleza ukuba ubomi bezesondo obudlulileyo buphelile, isondo siya kuphelelwa, kwaye mhlawumbi sithandeke, kuba umfazi uya kucinga nje ngomntwana ozayo, uyayeka ukuzijonga yena kunye nokunye. Ngoku ngoku kufuneka asebenze kanzima ukuze akwazi ukuxhasa ngemali intsapho yakhe malunga nokuzaliswa kwakhona. Mhlawumbi uya kufuna ixesha lokuba aqonde oko kwenzekayo. Umfazi yena uya kucinga ukuba ngoku uya kukhulula, umzimba wakhe uya kukhula, kwaye uya kuba mnandi kumyeni wakhe. Ingcamango yokuba indoda ayiyi kufumana isondo esaneleyo, ikhule ibe yinto engathandabuzekiyo yokungathembeki komyeni wakhe, ngenxa yoko, ukuqonda ngokufanayo kuya kuba yinto engafanelekanga yokuqonda. Ukuba ugcina umthandi wakho phantsi koxinzelelo oluqhubekayo, ukutshatyalaliswa kwendoda ngexesha lokukhulelwa kungaba yinyani, kwaye kungekhona nje ukusola.
Ukukhulelwa kunye nobudlelwane nomyeni wakhe
Amabali ukuba intombi yakho yashiya indoda yakhe ngexesha lokukhulelwa okanye indoda ishiye enye ibhinqa, yenza ukuba ucinge malunga nokuba ukukhulelwa kungabangela iingxaki kumyeni wakhe, oko kukuthi, iingxaki entsapho. Ewe, kwenzeka. Kodwa ukucinga ukuba oku kwenzeka kwaye uyisichakaphulo kwintsapho yakho. Kutheni kusengaphambili
Unqwenela unqwenela ukuba usapho olusempilweni kunye nolonwabo lwentsapho!