Ngaloo ndlela, ubuhlobo bobudlelwane bomzali bomntwana bubangelwa yizithethe ezithatyathwe kwintsapho, kunye nesitayela sokukhuliswa. Siza kuzama ukuqonda le ngcaciso ngokubanzi.
Iintlobo zobudlelwane babazali bomntwana
Kukho iintlobo ezimbalwa zonxibelelwano ezinokuvela phakathi kwabazali nabantwana beeminyaka ezahlukeneyo. Nangona kunjalo, iingcali zengqondo zengqondo zisebenzisa udidi lwe-Diana Bombrind, oluchaza kuphela iintlobo ezine zobudlelwane bomzali bomntwana, ngasinye sinezinto ezikhethileyo:
- Isitayela esisigunyazisiweyo sisona sinqwenelekayo, kuba abantwana abakhuliswa kwiintsapho ezinolu hlobo lokuziphatha kwabazali balungelelanisa lula ukutshintshwa, bafunde kakuhle, banokuzithemba ngokwaneleyo baze bafumane ukuphakama okubonakalayo. Kule meko, intsapho inomgangatho ophezulu wokulawulwa kwabazali, oko kunjalo, kodwa, inxulumene nesimo sengqondo esifudumele nesinobubele kwisizukulwana esincinane. Ngeemeko ezinjalo, abantwana baqaphela ngokukhawuleza imida kunye neenqandelelo ezibekwe zona kwaye abazicingi izenzo zabo zabazali ngokungalunganga.
- Isitayela sokugunyaza sibonakaliswa ngumgangatho ophezulu ngokungaqhelekanga wokulawulwa kwabazali kunye nesimo sengqeleko somama noyise kumntwana. Kule meko, abazali abavumeli ukuxubusha okanye ukukhanselwa kweemfuno zabo, musa ukuvumela abantwana ukuba bathathe isigqibo ngokwabo kwaye kwiimeko ezininzi banokuphumelela ngokuxhomekeka ngokupheleleyo kwintsholongwane. Abantwana abakhuliswayo kwiintsapho, baninzi bahlala bekhulumisana, banobuhlungu kwaye banobudlova. Ngolu hlobo lobudlelwane bomzali bomntwana ekufikeni kwexesha elidala, iimeko ezinzima zihlala zivela ngenxa yokuba umntwana uhlukaniswe ngokupheleleyo nabantu abadala, uyaba nako ukulawuleka kwaye ngokuqhelekileyo ufumana imeko engathandekiyo.
- Indlela yoLibali ihluke kwezinye iintlobo zonxibelelwano phakathi kwabazali nabantwana abanesimo esingenammiselo nesithandabuzo. Nangona oku, kubonakala ngathi akubi, ngokwenene, kulo mzekelo, kukho ukuvela kwemvume, okukhokelela ekuthandeni ngokugqithiseleyo nokuziphatha okungonelanelekanga kwabantwana.
- Ekugqibeleni, isitayela esingabandakaliyo sobudlelwane bomzali wabantwana sibonakaliswe ngokungahambi kakuhle kolawulo kunye nomdla kubomi bomntwana kubazali. Ngokuqhelekileyo oku kwenzeka kwiintsapho apho umama nootata babandakanyeka kakhulu emsebenzini kwaye abanako ukufumana ixesha labo inzala.
Kakade ke, bonke abazali banikela ngokukhethekileyo kwisimboli semfundo esondele kubo. Okwangoku, ukuze ulwalamano lwabazali luthembeke ngokunyanisekileyo, kwimeko yeminyaka yokufundela, kuyimfuneko ukuzikhethela ngokwaneleyo izinga lokulawulwa kwabazali kwaye ngexesha elifanayo ukuba ungayikhohlwa malunga nesidingo sokukhuthaza nokumdumisa umntwana, kwaye uhlala embonisa uthando lwakhe. Kuphela phantsi kweemeko ezinjalo umntwana uya kuziva ukuba kuyimfuneko, ngenxa yokuba uya kuba nesimo esifanelekileyo kubazali nakwezinye izihlobo eziseduze.