Wonke umntwana kufuneka akhule ngokuvisisana ngokupheleleyo kunye nothando, kuba ekukhuliseni kwakhe, bobabini nonina kufuneka bathathe inxaxheba ngokulinganayo. Umama, osondelene naye ixesha elide ngaphambi kokuba azalwe, kufuneka amfundise uthando kunye novelwano, kunye noyise ngokukhawuleza nangobulungisa. Nangona kunjalo, kwiintsapho ezininzi kwenzeka ukuba umntwana uqala ukwesaba uyise. Kutheni oku kwenzekayo kunye nendlela yokulungisa le meko-makhe sikhulume kweli nqaku.
Kutheni umntwana eyika ubaba kwaye yintoni ekhokelela kuyo?
Ekuqaleni, umntwana ubona uyise nje njengomncedisi nonina noncedisayo, ngoko ke ubawo ukwenzela ukuba asondele kwi-crumb, kufuneka enze umgudu omkhulu. Ngamanye amaxesha, ootata abancinci nabangenamava bayesaba ukuthatha umntwana kwizandla zabo, bayesaba ukulimaza umntwana. Kakade ke, ezo nkwantyi azikho nto, kwaye upapa ngezenzo zakhe ezingakhuselekanga zingenza umntwana angabi nemvakalelo. Kodwa kuya kuba nzima ngakumbi xa umntwana engayazi iphunga likabawo, umkhonto wezandla zakhe ezinamandla, ukuphefumula kunye nentliziyo yakhe. Umntwana akayi kukwazi ukubona uyise womhlobo nomntu osondele kuye.
Ingane inokwenkqiswa nguyise ngenxa yezwi layo elikhulu, intshebe ekhuni okanye amadevu, ukuba ubaba uya kunuka kakhulu njenge-cologne, utywala, ucuba. Xa ebonile uyise ebudeni boxinzelelo, umntwana unako ukuguquka kumzali, ngokukodwa xa uphinda uphinda uphindaphindiwe.
Ngokuqhelekileyo kukho iintsapho apho abantwana besongelwa nguyise. Ngokomzekelo, umama udla ngokusebenzisa amagama anjalo: "Nanko uTata uza kuza, kwaye ndiza kumxelela yonke into!" Okanye "Ngoku ndiya kubiza uTata, kwaye uya kusebenza nawe ngokukhawuleza!", Njll. Ukongezelela, kukho iimeko xa uyise eziphatha ngokubhekiselele kumntwana onobukrakra kwaye aze afune ukunyaniseka.
Ngokweengcamango ezininzi zeengqondo, ubunzima obukhulu bomzali buya kubakho nto. Umntwana akayi kuyika ubaba, njengengonyama eyoyikrakra, kodwa yobulungisa ngokumalunga nezenzo zakhe. Ukunyanzeliswa kunye nokunyanzeliswa kogqirha komntwana kunokukhokelela ekuphuhlisweni kwenani elikhulu leenkathazo, ukwesaba, ukubonakala kwedwa, kunye nokuncitshiswa kwamandla okunika amandla kunye nokukwazi ukukhusela uluvo lwalo.
Yintoni endiyenzayo?
Okokuqala, kubalulekile ukuba sikhumbule ukuba ukwakhiwa kobuhlobo bokuba nethemba kufuna ixesha elide kunye nomonde. Bonke abantu, ngaphandle koomama, ekuqaleni babonwa ngunyana njengento engaqhelekanga kunye nokuba yingozi. Ngoko ke, ukuze ungayesabi umntwana ngakumbi, qiniseka kwizenzo zakho.
Ukuba ufuna umntwana ukuba ayeke ukwesaba uyise, khumbula ukuba imeko yakho yengqondo kunye nokuhlola kwakho kwangaphakathi akuxhomekekanga ngentsana. Ngoko ke, kufuneka uqale ubonise ukuziphatha okufunayo, ukwenzela ukuba inkunzi ibone ukuba lo mntu ungumntu osondeleyo nonokwethenjelwa kuye, onokuthenjwa kunye nonina.
Fundisa uyihlo ukuba abe mnene kunye nosana, ukuba achukumise ngokufanelekileyo
Ewe, ubaba nguye onondla kunye nenkxaso yentsapho, nakwihlabathi lanamhlanje, ukubonelela ngokufanelekileyo izihlobo zakhe, oopapa kufuneka basebenze nzima kwaye bahlale ekhaya kancinci. Kodwa kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuba kubaluleke kangakanani ukunxibelelana nomntwana wakho, kwaye kukugqwesileyo konke, ngokwahlukileyo kumama wakho, yedwa. Qiniseka ukuba olo hlobo lwanxibelelwano luya kuzisa iimvakalelo ezintle kubo bobabini kunye nosana.